quantum-tiktok-operator

A Kubernetes operator for quantum-inspired scheduling on heterogeneous ARM64 clusters. Uses social annealing to minimize energy consumption and human attention simultaneously.

It is more resilient than many enterprise systems. Don't ask how.

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Overview

The quantum-tiktok-operator reconciles QuantumHamiltonian custom resources to perform pod scheduling via simulated quantum annealing. The Hamiltonian encodes scheduling constraints; the reconciler drives the cluster toward the ground state.

Decoherence is emulated via Chaos Mesh. State measurement is delegated to an external oracle webhook. Eventual consistency is the consistency model. Stop asking questions.

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Architecture

┌─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
│                     Operator Control Loop                   │
│                                                             │
│   QuantumHamiltonian (CRD)                                  │
│         │                                                   │
│         ▼                                                   │
│   ┌─────────────┐    social    ┌──────────────────┐         │ 
│   │  Reconciler │─────────────▶│ SocialAnnealer   │        │
│   └──────┬──────┘   annealing  └──────────────────┘         │
│          │                                                  │
│          ├──────────────────────▶ OracleClient (✅/💩)    │
│          │                                                  │
│          └──────────────────────▶ ChaosInjector             │ 
│                                  (decoherence simulation)   │
└─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘

State is shared across pods via etcd. Entanglement between pods is managed by the pkg/entanglement package. Correlation is maintained until both endpoints open the channel — at which point the wavefunction collapses and ByteDance acquires your scheduling preferences.

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Quickstart

# Install CRDs
kubectl apply -f config/crd/

# Install RBAC
kubectl apply -f config/rbac/

# Deploy operator
kubectl apply -f config/deploy/operator.yaml

# Apply a Hamiltonian
kubectl apply -f config/samples/production.yaml

Verify the cluster has reached a coherent state:

$ kubectl get quantumhamiltonians -A

NAMESPACE   NAME                  STATE   DOPAMINE   COHERENCE   TUNNELING   AGE
default     prod-friday-night     💩      8999       0.02        1337        2d
default     staging-cat-reels     ✅      420        0.91        12          6h
kube-sys    bootstrap-qubit       ✅      42         0.88        3           14d

Check operator events:

$ kubectl describe quantumhamiltonian prod-friday-night

Events:
  Type     Reason                Age   Message
  ----     ------                ---   -------
  Normal   Entangled             14m   Pod pair (prod-0, prod-1) entangled via etcd
  Warning  DecoherenceDetected   12m   Chaos Mesh injected WiFi failure (loss=50%)
  Normal   QuantumTunneling      11m   Pod prod-friday-night-7d9f relocated
  Warning  DecoherenceDetected   9m    Chaos Mesh injected WiFi failure (loss=50%)
  Normal   QuantumTunneling      8m    Pod prod-friday-night-4a1c relocated
  Warning  OracleTimeout         3m    Oracle did not respond within 5s — assuming 💩
  Normal   RealityCollapsed      1m    Wavefunction collapsed to suboptimal eigenstate

---

The CRD

apiVersion: quantum.tiktok/v1
kind: QuantumHamiltonian
metadata:
  name: prod-friday-night
spec:
  socialDopamine: 8999       # 0–9000. Do not set to 9000.
  cringeThreshold: 7000
  targetNamespace: default
  oracleEndpoint: https://oracle.internal/measure
  chaosEnabled: true         # disable only with a confirmed salary raise
  annealing:
    initialTemperature: 1000.0
    coolingRate: 0.95
    minTemperature: 0.01

socialDopamine above cringeThreshold triggers quantum tunneling. socialDopamine at 9000 is rejected by the OpenAPI validator. We learned this the hard way.

---

Prometheus Metrics

Metric	Type	Description
quantum_oracle_coffee_ratio	Gauge	Solutions found / coffees consumed
quantum_tunneling_total	Counter	Forced pod relocations
quantum_decoherence_events_total	Counter	Chaos Mesh victories
quantum_coherence_duration_seconds	Histogram	Time spent in coherent state
quantum_caffeine_intake_total	Counter	Human operator fuel consumption

Register a coffee:

curl -X POST http://operator:8080/caffeine
# ☕ coffee recorded. total: 7

At caffeine=0, quantum_oracle_coffee_ratio returns 0.0. This is technically incorrect but thermodynamically sound.

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Helm

helm install quantum-tiktok-operator ./charts/quantum-tiktok-operator \
  --set oracle.endpoint=https://oracle.internal/measure \
  --set chaos.enabled=true \
  --set annealing.initialTemperature=1000.0

---

Development

# Generate CRD manifests from Go types
make generate manifests

# Run locally against current kubeconfig
make run

# Run tests
make test

# Verify coherence (non-deterministic)
make verify-coherence

make verify-coherence exits 0 approximately 60% of the time. This is a feature.

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Project Structure

.
├── api/v1/                    # CRD types and deepcopy funcs
├── cmd/operator/              # operator entrypoint
├── config/
│   ├── crd/                   # generated CRD manifests
│   ├── rbac/                  # ClusterRole, ServiceAccount, bindings
│   └── deploy/                # Deployment, Service, PDB
├── controllers/               # reconciler logic
├── internal/
│   ├── annealing/             # social annealing algorithm
│   ├── chaos/                 # Chaos Mesh client
│   ├── metrics/               # Prometheus exporter
│   └── oracle/                # external oracle HTTP client
├── pkg/
│   └── entanglement/          # etcd-based pod correlation
├── charts/
│   └── quantum-tiktok-operator/  # Helm chart
└── hack/                      # codegen scripts, verify-coherence

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Contributing

Open a PR. Open an issue if your cluster is simultaneously alive and dead. Label decoherence bugs with kind/decoherence.

For 💩 responses from the oracle in production: check the Grafana dashboard, then check the coffee ratio, then check if it's Friday after 6 PM. The answer is usually the third one.

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License

WTFPL v2. See LICENSE.